OK, keep in mind, I’m not here to lecture on one night stands because the idea is dazzling yet confusing to me. Ah, one night stands. The best thing about it is you never know how it happens. One thing leads to another and whoo-ah (say it like Al Pacino from ‘Scent of a Woman’), you’re in a compromising position. Cold lonely nights, souls strolling around, last bottle of alcohol, small town motels, past midnight and the street lights start flickering- well, there isn’t any standard mood setting for one night stands. It’s all about improvisation and a little bit of surprise skill sets! And FYI, this commentary isn’t about the moral after-effects one suffers due to a good conscience or about the anti-societal concept regarding casual sex. Although, it would be good to point out this- wear protection. I will never ever trade this advice for anything.
10. Perfect for the ‘Not-Into-Relationship’ Kind of Person
OK. It’s like this- You want to have a good time, but not with someone you know. You don’t want to get into a serious relationship b’coz that really a headache! Girls will be like “Will he call me? Did I do anything wrong last night?” and boys will be like ” Maybe I should go out with her? Am I really within her league?” A lot of questions bang your head when you’re in a relationship and when you want it to be perfect, you’re in for a painful treat! So, to save yourself from such humbugging situation, may I propose today’s special on the menu – One Night Stands + ‘after care’ service i.e coffee in the morning (Optional)....
9. It’s Your Comfort Zone
There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I’m guessing the word ‘awkward’ fits right in. There’s no reason to feel uncomfortable here; c’mon you’re with a total stranger whose possibility of knowing your surname is like I don’t know- 48569! (Unless you reveal it!)The point is you’re a mystery- just enjoy the anonymous night. (Keep in mind casual sex isn’t for everyone, if you feel bad or repulsive, back off before it’s too late.)
8. Chitty Chatty Bang Bang
A little bit of chit chat won’t do any bad. It’s actually an excellent icebreaker. You get to know her side of the story and you spill out your beans. By the way, it’s nothing like contact details or such stuff. Basic ground level girly gossips like “Oh my god, that’s terrible! You know once I went out with this guy who used to sell roofies. He took me to his apartment and OMG, you should have seen his place…it was like the Caesar’s Palace. Anyways like I said, I was waiting when out of the blue…..”
Ya, that’s right, keep going.
7. Stop Spending Time on Useless Activities
Watching TV, sleeping as usual, gossiping around, eating out food from a trash can- is this how you want to spend the night. TV is such a slimy box headed interface. It will keep you hooked on to hours of sitcoms and movies. Not that I’m complaining- I really love the ‘Sherlock’ BBC series. But other than that it’s a particular waste of time- you either end up brain dead watching Ryan Reynolds as the Green Lantern or die of morbid obesity munching up left over foods bought from your Master Card. Why not spend your nights doing something exciting. To be clear, we’re not speaking about taking up hobbies or doing recreational activities. Hit some clubs; target your audience, narrow down to a binary choice, make your move and see if things work out!
6. Practice Makes Perfect
That’s right. Within umpteen practices, you may perhaps become a pro, a ladies’ man! Hell yeah, some day you could get a Ph.D on this subject! This is the best chance to try out some intense out-of-box ideas. Make yourself subject to experimentation. Pass the litmus test, hit the right chords and study the inference. A little R&D on Google and you will have plenty of options to try out.
5. ONS↔ FWBs
There’s always the possibility of converting One Night Stands to seek Friends with Benefits. You could move that particular person into your FWBs list. Have a little pillow talk, babble warm jokes to keep the laughter engine running, do whatever it takes to keep the person stay longer. Make sure that your partner gets the point and they play the right card!
4. Feeling Awesome
No rules. Complete freedom to hang out anywhere, swipe through the variety, pick up your partner (Don’t get too confident unless you have the killer looks) and make a good mess of yourself. Liberation is all one asks for and One Night Stands serve them well. You feel liberated every time and in the long run, a drastic change takes over. An open minded attitude coupled with ego boost will make you a fanny magnet! A flick of eye contact is enough to turn on the heat. Your otherwise depressed life is off limits now. Have a different outlook on things. Say bye-bye to mood swings. Feeling awesome right- give me some love! Hallelujah!
Achievements: Sex appeal – 100 pts
3. Mind-Blowing Performance
Like I said you’re not emotionally involved. So, there is no need for any compromise. You do what you want, which is obviously sex. ONS is all about the thrill. The fact that you’re to do it with a stranger sends a lot of hormones into action. There’s lot of things at stake here. Getting an ego boost after an amazing piece of time will do wonders to that shy attitude of yours. ONS can make you feel completely liberated. Who knows, it might turn out to be the best sex of your life!
2. Keeps You Healthy
It’s a medically proven fact that ‘regular performance on the bed’ is both physically and mentally healthy. ONS is less chit-chat and predominately filled with exciting, anonymous, wonderful sex (There’re several adjectives to go on, but I’m not in the mood.) Regular performances could considerably lower stress and blood pressure. Achoo- Say bye- bye to the common cold now that you have improved immunity. C’mon, who wants to do sweaty old push -ups when you can lose calories just by getting laid! That’s right, sex burns calories. Remember the moment that makes you feel great, it’s actually the release of oxytocin, the so-called love hormone. It boosts self-esteem, makes you pain tolerant to paper cuts and lets you have good night sleep! Now don’t ask me if it’s alright to continue doing this one night thing? I know that ONS isn’t a longevity plan. Ultimately, you get to marry someone at some point or get your heart broken. Can we just get on with the topic? Alright. So, you could reap all the above mentioned health benefits provided you are armed*and ready for battle.
P.S: Say no to alcohol and drugs. *Protection Please!
1. Well, It’s Fun Isn’t It!
Of course, what kind of a freaky question is that! Not much to speak here unless a pack of limited edition Star Trek DVDs is more tempting to you than sex. Now then, there’s a lot of inference that only dudes enjoy wonderful sex. Seriously! I mean double time seriously! I don’t believe so. The feeling of lovemaking is mutually satisfactory. Reciprocity is the ultimate deal here! The excitement is pure and for the first timer, it will probably be a home run. Ignoring the first few seconds were you get the ‘to do or not to do’ feeling, it’s fun to be a bad boy or a bag girl faking that accent, doing that twist you always fascinated about! With that said, let’s check the score board -
